It's been a long time since I've written here. It took a special kind of horrible to get me motivated to do so. What follows is the true, horrific story of two hours of my Saturday that I will never get back which were required to get back money Comcast otherwise would have stolen from me. If you have a choice, I strongly suggest you use another company. They're all terrible, but Comcast takes terrible to a whole new level. They are "The Room" of corporations.
A few months back we decided to upgrade our DVR to the Comcast X1. The standard HD DVR that they give you is the worst DVR we've ever seen. The menu and interface look like something out of War Games (that's an 80s movies for you young-ins). Just horrendous. We couldn't deal with it anymore. When we got the X1 we were excited. It looked and operated much better and was actually usable. Our excitement lasted about three days. At that point, it stopped functioning in any rational way. It was impossible to set up timers for any series at all and individual timers barely worked either. There were a number of other issues that I won't get into; suffice it to say, we were unhappy. We called Comcast and they promised to send out a technician to fix the problem. They never mentioned at any point that this service would cost any money.
A few days later a very nice independent contractor tech came out. After a lot of work he concluded that our box was defective and replaced it with another one. The new one's mostly worked well since then and we're more or less happy with it. Then came out bill, a few days ago.
The bill included a $50 charge for the tech's service call. This was upsetting, as not only had no charge been suggested, but the justification for one would be extremely weak. It was Comcast's crap equipment that barely lasted three days, after all. We had paid for the first installation. Comcast appeared to be saying we needed to pay AGAIN, less than a week later, to replace THEIR faulty equipment.
And so I set out to run the awful "Call Comcast" "customer service" gauntlet. There's no way to talk to anyone faster than 20 minutes, but fortunately, their phone system (after deluging you with several ads for programming) offers a 'call-back.' Put in your number and they'll call you back when its your turn. No waiting. Sounds great. It's not completely true, of course. I got the call-back and then had to wait in line another 5 minutes. A little weird, but not the end of the world.
When I finally got to a person, the rep explained that there was no way that he could take the charge off. He first mentioned that I could sign up for their 'customer protection plan.' Pay a monthly fee and the fee if someone has to come out to fix Comcast's garbage equipment is free! What a DEAL! No thanks. (They had previously tried this scam on me when the cable modem they gave me wouldn't work with my work's VPN. They refused to even TRY to help me since I only have 'basic service' which amounts to - have you tried turning it on or off again? Anything more complicated costs $15 a month. Scam.)
He then offered to compensate me by giving me a free premium channel. Since I can't watch the channels I do have, this wasn't acceptable to me. I suggested that he take off the charge for HBO, a channel I already have. He said this would work and would save me $30. He then offered to give me free 'blast' service for 3 months, which would upgrade my internet from 2nd tier to 1st tier in speed. I don't really need this, but he said it'd save another $30. Not completely satisfied, but at least feeling I was getting my money's worth, I agreed. Come to find out that because of my existing promotion with HBO, the 'savings' would be off full price. Without getting too into it, I'd get approximately no benefit. At this point, I asked to be transferred to a supervisor. This is where the fun really began.
Once I got put on hold - again, I realized that this genius's 'upgrading' of my internet had completely knocked out my internet. I reset my modem 3 times to no avail. I had been working from home and had quite a bit to still do, so this was a big issue for me. So now I'm stuck on hold waiting to talk to billing with no internet - and guess what, 25 minutes go by. Really! I was 'transferred to a supervisor' and had to wait ANOTHER 25 minutes. This was too much, I couldn't afford to wait for Internet service. So I gave up, hung up, and called tech support. This experience wasn't terrible. The woman was able to get my Internet working again. I asked her to send me back to billing. She transferred me to the 'so you're moving' line. Not helpful.
So I got call-back service again, waited another 5 minutes to actually talk to a person after the call-back and then asked to be transferred to a supervisor. This time I asked if the 20 minute wait was avoidable, after all, why couldn't the supervisor call me back? The rep put me on hold for a few minutes to find out. She then came back with the most convoluted response I've ever heard. The easiest thing to do would have been to say 'no, we can't do that.' Instead, she launched into a two minute explanation that can be summed up as: they can only call you back if you are already talking to them and you have to go. Great. So I have to wait the 20-25 minutes to talk to them to get them to call me back. In other words, NO THEY CAN'T. Sigh.
About 35 minutes go by. Finally I get Hector, the supervisor on the line. By this point, I am fuming. I tell him that I appreciate that I finally got to him after my two-hour adventure. I then explain the situation and get some weak explanation about them crediting the account only if the tech guy had not been at the house for very long etc. This guy had been here awhile and done a lot of work. Great, I responded, I have no problem with the tech guy being paid, he did a good job. COMCAST should pay him to replace their garbage equipment, not me. That's the issue. At this point, Hector finally cracked a little bit. "I can give you $25 back. But that's the best I can do."
Not. Acceptable. I tore into him for five minutes about the horrible service and seeking an explanation for why I should pay *ANYTHING* for their poor equipment. Finally, he came back with..."I can give you $40 back. But that's it."
So now this guy is negotiating with me. After two hours of being on the phone waiting for a person who could do anything, dealing with an internet power outage caused by Comcast's idiocy, being transferred to the wrong department, and various other absurdities, the supervisor is trying to nickel and dime me - out of $10. "This'll satisfy him" he probably thought "and that $10 savings will make the bosses give me another look for that promotion!" Sorry, Hector, this is not your day. I did not go through two hours of utter bullshit to pay YOU $10 for YOUR garbage equipment. Are you going to compensate me for the two hours of my Saturday that I lost waiting to talk to a person? No? Then give me ALL my money back.
Hector finally relented, but gave me a half-ass lecture about how this was a one-time thing blah blah blah like he had done me some huge favor. I finished by telling him he needed to instruct his staff to TELL PEOPLE WHEN THEY WOULD BE CHARGED. Shocking advice that he said they would take as feedback. Somehow, I doubt that happened.
ALL this because:
1) The first HD-DVR they gave me was a pile of crap. Just the worst thing I've ever seen. Even Comcast's rep, when I ordered the X1 agreed with this assessment.
2) The X1 they sent originally WAS DEFECTIVE. So two straight horrible products from Comcast. Thanks guys.
3) Pass the charges onto the customer! Comcast gives you bad equipment, then charges you to fix bad equipment, then tries to get you to subscribe to a service plan for even more money to - wait for it - fix their garbage equipment.
If that isn't a scam, I don't know what is. Adam Smith would be using his invisible hand to smack these jerks in the face from the grave were he not as dead as Comcast's commitment to their customers.
Do yourself a favor - if you have a choice - go with DirecTV or Dish or ANYONE else. As soon as I move somewhere else where this choice is available, I will dump these idiots like they were a less charming less intelligent Paula Deen.
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